AMERICAN IDOL — Second Hollywood Round: Slaughter of the Front-Runners!

Oh, the drama. So much of it tonight, where to begin?

Let’s start with the best news of the evening. No more Bikini Girl! She abandoned her group practice then had the gall to call her teammates “fake girls” when she’s about as natural as Nicolas Cage’s acting. But we don’t have to deal with her any more! Yay! Her room needs to be disinfected after she leaves.

But, but, but…why is Nick Mitchell still there? Didn’t get to see him “sing” but at least he wasn’t wearing the shiny shirt so maybe he finally decided to take this seriously. We’ll see.

From what I could tell, the following are also among the (approx.) 75 who are safe: Megan Corkrey, Casey Carlson, Danny Gokey, Jamar Rogers, India Morrison, Anne-Marie Boskovich, Jasmine Murray, Taylor Vaifanua, Alex Wagner-Trugman, Adam Lambert, Jeremy Michael Sarver (what’s with the three names? He was only Michael Sarver during his original audition), Matt Breitzke, Jesse Langseth, Tatiana Del Toro, Jorge Nunez, Kristin McNamara, Nathaniel Marshall, Kris Allen, Justin Williams and many more whom I’d never seen before and could not I.D.

Many good people were cut tonight whom I was sorry to see go: Deanna Brown (bummer!), David Osmond (too bad), Rose Flack (aw, man!), Alexis Grace (frak!), and Emily Wynne-Hughes (crap!). We didn’t even get to hear Brown, Osmond or Grace sing so I have no idea what happened. As for Flack and Wynne-Hughes, they completely blanked on their lyrics and were fairly cut (according to Simon’s new hard rule) but they both had distinctive voices and personas and would’ve been assets to the show. I guess I’ll now throw my support behind Danny G, Megan C, Jasmine, Anoop and Leneshe, if the last two are still safe (I think they are).

Other highlights:

Bitchiest Good-bye: Nancy Wilson. Wow, that girl was bitta. She was angry through the whole rehearsal process, not undeservedly so because of that crazy, flaky Tatiana, but she couldn’t let go of her anger and ultimately it destroyed her performance.

Craziest Retort: Ryan Pinkston. After he got cut, he blamed it on Paula, saying he felt “manipulated and assaulted” (?!) and “I saw an evil in [Paula]’s eyes.”  The producers decided to play along by making Paula’s eyes glow red. Nice. Way to disrespect one of your judges and indulge a failed contestant’s nonsensical rant.

Best Group Performances: The first one and The Rainbow Coalition. The first group had India Morrison, Justin Williams, Matt “White Chocolate” Giraud, and Kris Allen rapping and beat-boxing Jackson 5’s “I Want You Back.”  They were really good and unique but I must say India only rapped a little bit and didn’t actually sing.

The Rainbow Coalition, consisting of Jamar, Danny, Taylor Vaifanua and unidentified girl, performed a strong, well-harmonized version of Queen’s “Somebody to Love.” That poor Danny cannot seem to stay away from lyrics involving death (“Each morning I get up I die a little,” plus “kiss from a rose on a grave” last night and “losing you would end my life, you see” from “I Heard It Through a Grapevine” originally) and his run at the end was unnecessary but he’s an awesome singer so I hope he cracks the Top Ten.

Performer Who Surprised Me Most: Adam Lambert. I never got this guy’s front-to-back comb-over hair and guyliner look, kinda David Cook crossed with Pete Wentz. Plus, I’m not a musical theater fan. But when he did that run of high notes in “Some Kind of Wonderful,” I put my sandwich down so I could pay full attention. That dude could really sing! Gonna have to keep a kohl-rimmed eye on this one.

Performer Who Came Out of Nowhere to Grab My Attention: Jesse Langseth. Who the heck is Jesse Langseth? I laid eyes on her for the first time last night when she also sang “Some Kind of Wonderful” in Matt Breitzke’s group and made a memorable first impression. She could be a dark horse in this competition.

What were the standout moments for you? Who were you most disappointed to see cut? Comment away!

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7 Comments

  • Reply
    ScriptPimp
    February 5, 2009 at 9:19 am

    Aww Bikini Girl has finally gone off to start her porn career…..or maybe she will find life on The Hills. Glad she’s gone.

    Ryan Pinkston was just crazy. Same with Tatiana. Please get a tranquilizer gun and put her down.

    Loved the Rainbow Coalition so much I downloaded the tune to my IPod.

    I think Adam Lambert will at least be in the top 5.

  • Reply
    ARB Ent
    February 5, 2009 at 9:25 am

    I have always thought of Group Week as a test by the judges to see if the person will be hard to collaborate with if they win. I think it is also a great way to find back up singers!

    Laughed out loud when they made Paula look reptilian.

  • Reply
    EireGo
    February 5, 2009 at 9:38 am

    THAT WAS INSANE LAST NIGHT!!!

    Where the heck do they find these people? And why choose this band of nuts as opposed to the ones they met at the auditions? They need a better screening process.

    Tatiana’s laugh alone screams “I’M INSANE.”

    Yeah, I will tune in again next week.

  • Reply
    ShelleyP
    February 6, 2009 at 1:53 am

    Ok, haven’t seen it yet but I’ll be hunting it down in light of your reviews!

    {Never underestimate the power of wearing shoes… preferably something with soles … }

    In the last season of Australian Idol {we’re between series currently}, they ditched the group performances. On one hand, it seemed more relevant to see how they go solo with a quick study under pressure. On the other, I was disappointed because it really tests their musicianship to get it together with others in such a short spell. Plus the group exercise is often Very revealing of their true characters {or lack thereof}!

    • Reply
      popculturenerd
      February 7, 2009 at 7:22 pm

      ShelleyP,

      I’m ambivalent about the usefulness of the group exercise. It reminds me of grade school where there’s always some kid who gets picked last for a group and always someone who bosses everyone in the group around. Singers should be allowed to just focus on the music because producers aren’t looking for someone they can plug into a band. But you and yeti9000 make a good point about how the group exercise reveals people’s true characters so perhaps it serves some purpose. I don’t want my American Idol to be a stank bitch or jerk.

  • Reply
    yeti9000
    February 6, 2009 at 6:12 am

    OK, finally, finally caught up on all our “Idol” watching last night and I gots a few things to say:

    1. Bikini Girl is a straight-up ho. I despise the bitch and was so glad to see her go…yuck!

    2. Nancy Wilson got a bum rap, but more than anything, I think that crazy VH1 “Charm School” hair sent her packing more than her lousy singing…yikes, that nasty ass weave was insane.

    3. That cute hippie chick Flack just couldn’t cut the mustard, baby. Loved her look and her backstory had us both in tears several times, but she was a total Michelle Kwan in the end. You know, great in rehearsals and stuff, but totally lame when it really counts on the big show. In any case, sorry to see her go…she was my favorite.

    4. Don’t remember her name, but ditto to that other funky girl with the pink hair. Momma was right, why’d you change your song, dumbass? She blew it, big time…

    5. Also, that gay dude on Nancy’s team is insane, if he makes it through to the real show, I will play a drinking game every night for the rest of the season…one shot for every histrionic sob. God, I hate him…

    6. And finally, Tatiana is the freaking devil. What a total bitch! We just take comfort in the fact that having showed her true colors this early on, she will be quickly eliminated by the viewers. I’m just hoping America hates the self-serving bitch as much as we do…yikes…

    Oh yeah, and did I mention that bikini girl is a straight-up whore? 🙂

    • Reply
      popculturenerd
      February 7, 2009 at 7:33 pm

      yeti9000,

      You’ll get no argument from me about the whoriness of Bikini Girl! She is the grossest contestant I’ve ever seen in American Idol history. Like I said, the producers need to hand out antibiotics to the other contestants and disinfect her room.

      Nate Marshall is a drama queen. His constant crying is too much. It would’ve been really funny if someone had given him one of those hard theatrical slaps across the face and said, “Snap out of it, man!” And did you see his “choreography” during the group performance? Hilarious!

      Glad to hear you’re finally caught up on this season!

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