Yeah, yeah, it’s exec produced by Steven Spielberg, stars Anjelica Huston and Debra Messing, has big musical numbers…but is it any good? Well, it’s technically impressive, but after finishing the pilot episode of Smash (premiering Monday, Feb. 6 at 10/9c on NBC), I still had a hard time locating its heart.

The story revolves around the songwriting team of Tom and Julia (Christian Borle and Messing) trying to find the perfect actress to play Marilyn Monroe in a Broadway production about her life. We see a room full of wannabes and one bad audition and by the end of the pilot, it looks like it’s down to just two contenders: blond and curvy Ivy Lynn (Megan Hilty, Wicked) and doe-eyed brunette Karen Cartwright (Katharine McPhee, American Idol). Ivy is a chorus girl itching to strut her stuff in a lead role, while Karen is a waitress from Iowa who’s so green, she immediately jumps at the chance to go over to the director’s home at 10 p.m. for a one-on-one “coaching session.” Uh huh. That’s not just being a naive actress; that’s being a stupid female.

Hilty

Both Hilty and McPhee have superb singing voices, but so far, neither Ivy nor Karen seems like a shoo-in to play Monroe. Ivy has the Broadway experience, is more dynamic while performing, looks more like the iconic actress, but there’s a been-around-the-block hardness to her character that wouldn’t be right for Marilyn, who’s softer around the edges. Karen has more of the innocence, but she’s so inexperienced as an actress that I, too, would hesitate to put my money on her to carry a big Broadway production. This is part of the conflict of Smash, since the creative team is having trouble deciding between the two. (Isn’t there a third choice? It’s New York!)

McPhee

In the real world, though, Hilty is obviously the stronger actress. Putting McPhee up against her is like scheduling a fight between Jet Li and a kid who just started studying martial arts two weeks ago. The running gag in the show is that producers keep calling Karen “light” when rejecting her for roles and she doesn’t know what that means (she does eventually find out). The description is apropos, though, because McPhee is a lightweight compared to Hilty. Some of McPhee’s performance looks stilted, her movements are affectations, as if she’s not yet settled into the role.

Messing, whose work I enjoyed on Will & Grace, hasn’t found her footing, either, as Julia. She has a couple scenes in which she isn’t quite convincing as a workaholic taking on two new projects at the same time: trying to adopt a child and producing an original musical. The actress was playing Julia’s dilemma in a dramatic fashion, but it seems as if she just wanted to burst out and do something goofy. Anjelica Huston is formidable as usual, but her producer character is—as of now—secondary (she brings money to the table). It’s more about the dream and the passion and sweat and tears, and yes, some of it is kind of cheesy.

But there is a big, glossy baseball number (because Marilyn was married to Joe DiMaggio), and if you like peeking behind the curtains of a big theatrical production, seeing the training and rehearsals and possible catfights that happen along the way to opening night, this might be the ticket for you.

Note: If you can’t wait until Monday, the entire pilot is available now as a free download on iTunes.

Nerd verdict: Not quite Smashing but has potential

Photos: NBC

Rich Miner
Shell Sherree
Kelly V
Paulette
Rhonda Hicks

Congrats! Please use this contact form to send me your address and I’ll get this in the mail to you. If I don’t hear from you by Saturday, Feb. 4, noon PST, alternate winners will be chosen.

What? That slogan came straight from Elvis himself.

Thank you to everyone who entered. If you’ve attended a signing then you already know this, but if not, Robert has been sharing on his tour some of your assumptions of him and getting big laughs from the crowds. I’d also like to share that Taken will debut on the New York Times bestseller list at #1 for the week of February 12! I assume he’s pretty happy about that!

Carl Lennertz, Executive Director of World Book Night USA (it’s also happening in the UK on the same day), generously took some time to answer a few questions for me about this exciting event.

Pop Culture Nerd:  Why was the deadline extended?

Carl Lennertz: Mostly due to the Super Bowl ad we’re going to run. Hah! I sensed people were stressing and could use a little extra time. And we had built in some time. But I can’t go past Feb. 6. We could launch now with every state very well covered, and every city—and some towns I never heard of, which is great—but I figured the more the merrier. Even if I can’t have less stress, I can offer it to others.

PCN: Can you suggest some places that would make great locations for givers to find light readers?

CL: I hesitate to answer because I want the givers to do that themselves, to let it be spontaneous and original. And they have. The public TOTALLY gets this, and it’s been amazing to see the responses. If you like, I’ll share some after Feb. 6. Okay, okay, don’t pout. My favorites run from nursing home waiting rooms to pubs, from commuter buses (to those not reading—aha!) to schools in low-income neighborhoods.

PCN: What happens if you get an overabundance of requests for some of the titles and not enough for some of the others?

CL: We’re ahead of you on that one. That’s why the givers had to make a second and third choice. A fair number of givers had a different place in mind depending on the book they got!

PCN: What are your expectations for WBN? How will you rate its success?

Carl Lennertz

CL: I want all the givers to have a fun, safe, and rewarding day; for the bookstores and libraries to continue to be cherished as the community centers that they are; to get at least 100 local news stories and 2 national stories about WBN and the value of reading; to have a success that engenders some foundation money so we can grow this yearly; and ultimately, to touch the lives of a LOT of people. I won’t say change a life, as that’s a bit grandiose, but still, that would be possible. Just the gift of a book might touch the giver and recipient in some sweet or deep way.

PCN: If givers want to share their experiences about that night, is there a central message board/forum/site where they can go?

CL: I’m not as interested in any central sort of gathering point for the stories, except perhaps a WBN Flickr page. And Twitter is essentially national. But what I would love is for the year-round love and sharing to reside and go ’round locally within each community, with the bookstore or library at the center. We’re a huge country, and I’m big on regional flavor, or the flavor of communities, online or otherwise. And yes, it could all bubble up via natural interest groups, like teachers, soldiers, health care workers, government officials, caregivers of all sorts, and so on. We’ll see!

Thanks so much, Carl! And thank you to Wiley at AuthorsOnTheWeb.com for facilitating the interview.

If you haven’t applied to be a giver, go here for more info and to sign up. Here’s a list of the books that were chosen to be given away. If you’re in the UK & Eire, go here.

If you have applied, what books did you request, and why? Good luck and happy giving!

For her seventh thriller featuring profiler Dr. Tony Hill and Detective Chief Inspector Carol Jordan, Val McDermid unleases not one but two serial killers. The first, Jacko Vance, is their worst nightmare from the past, someone they put away years ago in The Wire in the Blood. Vance escapes from prison and is hell bent on, well, retribution. Jordan and Hill have to predict and protect the people, including each other, they feel are most in danger, but Vance seems to be several steps ahead of them. Meanwhile, they also have to hunt another killer doing grisly things to prostitutes. The cases are solved in the end, but Hill and Jordan experience unfathomable loss along the way, and their relationship, as well as their lives, will never be the same.

As usual, McDermid doesn’t flinch from exploring the dark passages of humanity, if one can even call the killers human. Vance does something so revolting at one point that my stomach dropped to the floor, as if I were in an elevator plunging into hell. But McDermid’s deft prose, sprinkled with psychological insight and sparks of wit, makes it hard to turn away. She also keeps the pace humming along, which helps since a lot happens. The ending is a bit anticlimactic, and the story could probably do with less of Hill’s internal monologue about how much he cares for Jordan—a point that’s repeatedly and clearly established—but McDermid has thrown such huge obstacles into the pair’s already rocky path that it’ll be interesting to see where they go from here.

Nerd verdict: Gut-wrenching Retribution

Wow, I was bored throughout this show, despite the fact it’s produced by my union and I got to vote for the awards. I can’t even do a best & worst list because the show was, ah, listless and predictable. (Except for when Tina Fey took Steve Buscemi’s wine glass from him and chugged it.) It got to the point where I was happy people didn’t show up to accept their awards because then the show could move closer to its conclusion.

I did wake up a little when Jean Dujardin won best actor for The Artist because, while I adore George Clooney, I liked Dujardin’s performance more. After he won, I crossed my fingers for Michelle Williams to pull an upset, too, for her transformative work in My Week with Marilyn, but I’m good with Viola Davis’s win for The Help.

I voted for Artist for best movie ensemble (wonder if Uggie would’ve gotten an Actor?) but Help‘s win is fine. I did wish, though, that Cicely Tyson had been allowed to make the acceptance speech since 1) she’s a legend, 2) Davis already had her moment when she won her individual award, and 3) Davis herself said Tyson was the reason she wanted to be an actor when she was eight years old.

Anyway, the rest of the winners are:

Supporting actress in a motion picture: Octavia Spencer for The Help

Supporting actor in a motion picture: Christopher Plummer for Beginners

TV drama ensemble: Boardwalk Empire

TV comedy ensemble: Modern Family

Actress in TV drama series: Jessica Lange for American Horror Story

Actor in TV drama series: Steve Buscemi in Boardwalk Empire

Actress in TV comedy series: Betty White for Hot in Cleveland

Actor in TV comedy series: Alec Baldwin for 30 Rock (he’s hilarious but pleeeease give it to someone else next year! Six is enough for this role!)

Actress in a TV movie or miniseries: Kate Winslet for Mildred Pierce

Actor in a TV movie or miniseries: Paul Giamatti for Too Big to Fail

Movie stunt ensemble: Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2

TV stunt ensemble: Game of Thrones

Even the fashion was ho-hum, not many eye poppers or obvious train wrecks. Some highlights:

1. Michelle Williams. I love that she wore a bright color, and the Valentino is very pretty, but the shoes look a little mall-ish.

2. Viola Davis. Fantastic gown; not sure about the hair, though. Perhaps pulled back and sleek would have been better for a whole goddess-like look.

3. Sofia Vergara. This color is smashing on her, but she still stayed safe in the same body-hugging silhouette she usually wears.

4. Jessica Chastain. The vibrant blue is much better than the white she wore to the Globes, and it’s striking against her red hair, but overall the dress is pretty dull.

5. Shailene Woodley. This dress didn’t make sense to me at all. Maybe she was going for a Hawaiian motif to represent The Descendants?

6. Lea Michele. This made me think of Dave Matthews’s “Crash into Me” lyrics: If she hikes up her skirt a little more, she’d show her world to everyone.

7. Jennifer Carpenter. This is one of my favorites. It might be shorter and more casual, but the beading and details are beautiful, and the dress looks perfect for a sunny, almost 80-degrees day.

8. Emma Stone. She’s so adorable, she can wear whatever she wants.

9. Tilda Swinton. You know you’re in for a slow night when even her gown looks drab.

10. Angelina Jolie. The draping is very sensual, and the metallic gives it a touch of rock ‘n’ roll, but it’s black. Zzzzzzzzzz.

11. Naya Rivera. I’m tired of looking at her breasts at every award show. If it’s not front cleavage, it’s side boobs. We get that you’re hot, now try something classy next time.

12. Emily Blunt. This is a difficult color to wear, but she looks stunning in it. The fit of the gown is divine.

13. Meryl Streep. Mr. PCN said he kept expecting her to pull out a lightsaber from her Jedi-looking outfit.

14. Rose Byrne. She said she was inspired by Michelle Pfeiffer’s Scarface look. Works for me.

15. Regina King. We end with my favorite of the evening. It makes me think of spring.

Which were your favorites?

So I decided to compile my own list of words that I wish would go away, because they’re annoying, abused, misused, or they just don’t make any sense to me. I want to stop making the expression in this picture because it causes wrinkles.

Here goes:

• Nom nom. Is this supposed to be an onomatopoeia? It doesn’t sound like any noise I’ve ever heard anyone make while eating something delicious. It sounds more like someone chewing with their mouth open.
• Interwebs. I think someone was being cute, came up with an alternative to Internet—a smush of Internet and World Wide Web?—and then that person’s friend said, “Hey, that’s cute! I’m going to use it, too!” A million people later, it’s not cute anymore.
• Lurve. In high school, all the “luv” in my yearbook made my teeth hurt, and now it’s the updated version of the lame-ass alternative people use when they can’t or don’t want to say “love.” Say the real word and mean it, or don’t say it at all. Who wants to be lurved?
• Shit ____say/s. First it was my dad, now it’s girls, black girls, white girls, San Franciscans, L.A. people, rich people, and now even Liz Lemon. Say it isn’t so, NBC. Enough with all the shit already!
• Can of whoop/whup ass. It’s not 1998 anymore.

• Grabs you by the throat and doesn’t let go. I was in a bookstore recently and saw this phrase as a blurb on 1 out of 2 books I picked up. Granted, I was in the mystery/thriller section so this phrase may not be as prevalent on, say, romance novels (unless the characters like a little rough action). But seeing it on so many books I read has made it completely useless to me, and I wish reviewers/blurb writers would let the phrase go.
• Totes (in place of “totally”). Do I have to say anything more?
• Anyhoo. This one confounds me. It’s not a shorter version of “anyhow,” and is spelled almost exactly the same. When you get to that last letter, is it so much easier to type an “o” instead of a “w”?
• Literally (when it’s not literal at all). Just today, I read that a recently Oscar-nominated actress said, “Literally, like, my brain snapped in two.” Really?

Of course, I’m not literally having conniptions over these words; this is done in ranty fun. Now it’s your turn. What words or phrases would you like to see exiled from our vernacular? Did I use any of them in this post?

Michael Fassbender’s work in Shame is also woefully missing from the same category. It’s brave and raw, and he made a difficult character sympathetic. I’m glad Demián Bichir got a nod, though I don’t know why people found that shocking since he was nominated for a SAG Award.

Rapace as Lisbeth

Rooney Mara did just fine as Lisbeth Salander in The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo, but if anyone deserved a nomination for playing that role, it should’ve been the fierce, original Lisbeth, Noomi Rapace (here‘s what I thought of her performance). I don’t know anyone who’s seen both versions who doesn’t agree.

I have no problem with Albert Brooks being omitted from the best supporting actor race. Why should someone get a nomination for playing against type? It should be because the performance is remarkable, right? His work was solid as the gangster in Drive, but I didn’t find it exceptional or among the best of the year.

McGregor with Cosmo in BEGINNERS, Photo: Focus Features

Best Supporting Actor is the weakest out of the acting categories for me. Why is Christopher Plummer the front runner? I liked Beginners and his performance as a gay man who’s liberated by the death of his wife, but it wasn’t more outstanding than anything else he’s done in the past. Ewan McGregor, Melanie Laurent, and Goran Visnjic (maybe even Cosmo the Jack Russell terrier) moved me more in that movie. Plummer’s nomination smells like a lifetime award thing.

I also didn’t find Kenneth Branagh’s work in My Week with Marilyn to be anything special and don’t mean that as an insult. He was just, you know, doing his usual Branagh thing. One of the slots in this category should’ve gone to Sir Ben Kingsley, who got snubbed despite being Hugo‘s most valuable player on screen.

Speaking of which, Hugo got the most nominations of any film? Puh-leeze. I completely agree with best cinematography, visual effects, and art direction, but most of the rest were generous.

I also don’t understand Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close being nominated for best picture, but I’m not alone here so enough said. I do agree with the Academy leaving Bridesmaids out of the best picture category. Yes, it made me laugh a couple times, but the fact people thought it deserved to be among the best movies of the year confounded me. This is not because I’m against comedies getting Oscar love; I’m very much for that. Bridesmaids just wasn’t that comedy.

So, my winner predictions for the lead categories are:

Best Picture—The Artist

Best Actor—George Clooney (though I’d love a Jean Dujardin upset)

Best Actress—Viola Davis  (but am rooting for Michelle Williams, who’ll get my vote in the SAG Awards this weekend)

Best Supporting Actor—Christopher Plummer

Best Supporting Actress—Octavia Spencer

Best Director—Michel Hazanavicius

Here are the major nominees:

BEST PICTURE

The Artist (Thomas Langmann, Producer)

The Descendants (Jim Burke, Alexander Payne and Jim Taylor, Producers)

Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close (Scott Rudin, Producer)

The Help (Brunson Green, Chris Columbus and Michael Barnathan, Producers)

Hugo (Graham King and Martin Scorsese, Producers)

Midnight in Paris (Letty Aronson and Stephen Tenenbaum, Producers)

The Tree of Life (Nominees to be determined)

War Horse (Steven Spielberg and Kathleen Kennedy, Producers)

Moneyball (Michael De Luca, Rachael Horovitz and Brad Pitt, Producers)

ACTOR IN A LEADING ROLE

Demián Bichir, A Better Life

George Clooney, The Descendants

Jean Dujardin, The Artist

Gary Oldman, Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy

Brad Pitt, Moneyball

ACTOR IN A SUPPORTING ROLE

Kenneth Branagh, My Week with Marilyn

Jonah Hill, Moneyball

Nick Nolte, Warrior

Christopher Plummer, Beginners

Max von Sydow, Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close

ACTRESS IN A LEADING ROLE

Glenn Close, Albert Nobbs

Viola Davis, The Help

Rooney Mara, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo

Meryl Streep, The Iron Lady

Michelle Williams, My Week with Marilyn

ACTRESS IN SUPPORTING ROLE

Bérénice Bejo, The Artist

Jessica Chastain, The Help

Melissa McCarthy, Bridesmaids

Janet McTeer, Albert Nobbs

Octavia Spencer, The Help

DIRECTING

The Artist, Michel Hazanavicius

The Descendants, Alexander Payne

Hugo, Martin Scorsese

Midnight in Paris, Woody Allen

The Tree of Life, Terrence Malick

WRITING (Adapted Screenplay)

The Descendants, Screenplay by Alexander Payne and Nat Faxon & Jim Rash

Hugo, Screenplay by John Logan

The Ides of March, Screenplay by George Clooney & Grant Heslov and Beau Willimon

Moneyball, Screenplay by Steven Zaillian and Aaron Sorkin. Story by Stan Chervin

Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy, Screenplay by Bridget O’Connor & Peter Straughan

WRITING (Original Screenplay)

The Artist, Written by Michel Hazanavicius

Bridesmaids, Written by Annie Mumolo & Kristen Wiig

Margin Call, Written by J.C. Chandor

Midnight in Paris, Written by Woody Allen

A Separation, Written by Asghar Farhadi

ANIMATED FEATURE FILM

A Cat in Paris, Alain Gagnol and Jean-Loup Felicioli

Chico & Rita, Fernando Trueba and Javier Mariscal

Kung Fu Panda 2, Jennifer Yuh Nelson

Puss in Boots, Chris Miller

Rango, Gore Verbinski

Click here for the full list. What did you think of the nominations?

Photo: Greg Gorman

But speaking of happy and new, Robert Crais‘s latest novel, Taken, drops tomorrow (Jan. 24, Putnam), and I have a Q&A with him today. The novel moved me so deeply, I almost can’t talk about it for fear of diluting the feeling. So I’ll just say a few words and force encourage you to experience it for yourself.

Taken has the usual action as Elvis Cole and Joe Pike go up against deadly human traffickers, but it’s also a story about love, friendship, compassion, and chasing your dreams. There’s a scene that defines how Joe feels about Elvis, expressed in the only way Joe knows how—wordlessly. It’s breathtaking for both its simplicity and depth of feeling, and one day, when someone compiles a list of iconic scenes in private eye novels that best exemplify the relationship between a detective and his partner, this moment must be on top. It makes you wish you had friends like them; it makes you wish you could be like them.

I’m thrilled to have Robert in the PCN house, answering questions about the different ways he’s been taken (stop snickering) and sharing his personal photos. Afterward, stick around for a little giveaway.

Pop Culture Nerd: What’s the best trip you’ve ever taken (physical or chemical)?

Robert Crais: Prowling through bear country on Admiralty Island, Alaska, and through the East Kootenay Rockies in Canada at 9000 feet before the snow melts. Dangerous, primitive, natural, beautiful. I enjoy physical outdoorsy things like mud runs, scuba diving, and the adventures I have doing research, but the isolation and purity of rugged wilderness areas like inner Admiralty and the East Kootenays call to my heart. If it’s easy to get there, I don’t want to go.

90 feet down in the Gulf of Mexico

With his team, doing the Camp Pendleton Mud Run

PCN: Where’s the weirdest place you’ve been taken for research?

RC: A whorehouse in Mississippi.

No whores here, just doing research with the ATF

PCN: Huh. I noticed you didn’t send over photos of that. Speaking of which, favorite picture you’ve taken?

RC: Sunrise breaking over Los Angeles while the city sleeps.

PCN: Biggest risk ever taken?

RC: Writing L.A. Requiem.

PCN: What do you most fear will be taken from you?

RC: My mental faculties.

PCN: Best advice ever taken?

RC: Write what you love.

PCN: Biggest misTaken assumption about you?

RC: What do people assume?

PCN: I’ll ask them. Last Q—what do you hope will be taken away from Taken?

RC: That people find it exciting, gripping, moving, and truthful.

Thank you, Robert, for answering my questions. Readers, it’s your turn to be Taken. For more info, go to his website or peruse his tour dates on Facebook.

But first, I have a little giveaway. I’m giving away five Elvis Cole Detective Agency business cards with a slogan that comes straight from the novel. I won’t ruin it by showing or saying what it is. If you win one and don’t like spoilers, make sure you read the book before I send it to you!

I printed these cards myself and they are in no way official, but they will be signed by Robert. To enter, leave a comment below answering his question of what you assume about him. Be creative—the more wrong the assumption, the better!

Winners will be chosen randomly via random.org. Giveaway is open to everyone, and will end this Sunday, Jan. 29, 5 p.m. PST.

Buy Taken from Amazon| From an indie bookstore

From L: Soderbergh, McGregor, Fassbender, Carano, and McHale

Last November, Haywire was the secret screening at the AFI Fest, with a Q&A session afterward with director Steven Soderbergh, Gina Carano, Michael Fassbender, Ewan McGregor, moderated by Joel McHale. I discussed the movie back then with my contributor Eric Edwards, but since the movie is opening tomorrow (Jan. 20), I thought I’d post some highlights from the lively Q&A.

McHale asked Soderbergh, “How’d you find Gina?” Soderbergh said, “I watched her fights on CBS on Saturday nights…I just thought, ‘Wow’—somebody should really build a movie around this woman…She’s a natural beauty and she beats people into a pulp in a cage.” He’d just been fired from a movie (he didn’t say which one but it’s believed to be Moneyball), he’d always loved early Bond films, so he decided to combine a spy film with “this new thing” because “why is Angelina Jolie the only woman currently who’s allowed to run around with a gun?” When Carano said yes to the movie, he called screenwriter Lem Dobbs (The Limey) and mapped out a plot outline about revenge, with the directive: “She needs to beat her way through the cast.”

And beat them she did. Ewan McGregor was asked about his fight scene with her. He told a story about how he was supposed to throw a punch over her head at one point, but instead, “I punched her in the head. She came straight up and said, ‘Are you okay?’…I really f**king hurt my hand! She didn’t even feel it!”

Soderbergh said he approached Fassbender and asked, “How would you like to get your ass kicked by a woman?” Fassbender replied, “It’s one of my fetishes in life.” He said his brutal fight scene with Carano in a hotel room took two days to shoot, after which “I went back to my room and puked. I put it down to a bug and not getting my ass kicked by Gina.”

McHale asked Carano about her experience fronting the movie, surrounded by such an impressive supporting cast. She said, “It was surreal. I felt more vulnerable than I’ve ever felt in my life.” There’s been press about how her voice was electronically lowered in the movie, and though she sounded softer in real life—probably due to being nervous as a newbie doing Q&A in front of a film audience—she didn’t sound drastically different than she did as Mallory Kane.

In the movie, Carano sports cornrows at one point and McHale jokingly wanted to know if she was doing a Bo Derek homage. “I fight in cornrows,” Carano said, explaining that it keeps her hair out of her face while she’s working. McHale quipped, “I know. I work at E! Ryan [Seacrest] is always punching me in the knees.”

Speaking of hair, McGregor’s character has a geeky cut that’s “based on a guy who owns a private army,” the actor said. He declined to identify that person.

McHale moved on to Fassbender, asking about the roots of his surname. The Irish-German actor said, “In English, it means Cooper, which is someone who makes binding for barrel carts.”

News of the Kardashian divorce had recently broken back on the day of this screening, so McHale asked Soderbergh, “How do you feel?” Soderbergh said, “I almost didn’t come tonight. We’re all in a period of mourning.” He added, “I’ve been on some miserable shoots and 72 days is a long time.” Judging from the good humor and camaraderie of the cast, I’m guessing Haywire‘s shoot wasn’t one of those.

Photo: Jason Merritt/Getty Images

Ready? Here goes.

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How many can you name? Hit the comments and show off your nerdy stripes. If there are answers before yours, you don’t have to copy them because they’re not necessarily all right!