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Behind the Scenes at the Golden Globes 2011

Late last night, long after the broadcast ended, a friend of mine who attended the awards ceremony and after-parties called to share some backstage details. The following is in her words.

[For my thoughts on best & worst of the show, click here. For my fashion roundup, go here.]

This was my favorite Globes ever. It’s so festive and happy and everything the Globes should be. It also had the strictest security in Globes history. The ticketing and party access was very strict.

Catherine Zeta-Jones and I talked for a while because she was outside smoking. She was very sweet and has plans to return to the stage with a secret project. And then Jane Fonda came out and said, “Can I have a drag of that, please?” Catherine said, “Of course, darling” and gave Fonda a puff on her cigarette. Fonda then complimented Catherine on how well she’s been holding up during Michael Douglas’s cancer ordeal.

Alec Baldwin came up to Jennifer Lopez at one point and said, “Seacrest told me to tell you your shoes are f*cking ugly.” Her response was “Seacrest is a jerk!” And then they laughed.

There were a bunch of Glee cast members who weren’t allowed to eat or sit in the ballroom. They were set up at a viewing party across the parking lot. Right before the best comedy TV series was announced, they were escorted to the ballroom so they could all go on stage in case the show won. [Ed. note: It did.]

I asked Jesse Tyler Ferguson [of Modern Family] when he’s going back to Broadway because he’s awesome and he said, “I need the money so I’m going to stay here.”

I thought Sandra Bullock looked the best in person. I liked her bangs. Everyone thought Emma Stone was Jaime Pressly. Scarlett Johansson looked washed out.

For the guys, Chris Hemsworth and Armie Hammer looked good. Armie was very sweet. He gave me the biggest hug because I’d seen him at the Hollywood Movie Awards [a few months ago].

Peter Facinelli and Robert Pattinson hung out with each other all night long. I told Andrew Lincoln [from Walking Dead] I loved him in Love Actually and he gave me this look that said, “Where is this going?” so I asked him for a photo. But then a security guy said, “No photos here” so we went into a corner where they couldn’t see us and took a photo.

That’s about it. I’m going to celebrate by eating some fries now!

Is it any wonder we’re friends?

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Highlights and Lowlights of Golden Globes 2011

Gervais having a laugh

I look forward to the Globes every year because they are decidedly nutty—weird nominations, random presenters (Alicia Keys?) and drunk acceptance speeches. This year was no exception, starting with Helena Bonham Carter’s wacky dress and mismatched shoes on the red carpet (more on that in the fashion recap here).

That’s not to say the show didn’t have its dull, awkward moments. There were no surprises in the movie categories, with Colin Firth, Natalie Portman, Melissa Leo, Christian Bale, David Fincher, Aaron Sorkin and The Social Network winning Globes as predicted and pretty much guaranteed Oscars. Also, host Ricky Gervais’s material was surprisingly more low-brow than sharp.

For a complete list of winners, click here. Read on for my reactions to some of the other stuff that went down.

Biggest gasp in the room: When Gervais said in his opening remarks regarding I Love You, Phillip Morris, which stars Jim Carrey and Ewan McGregor, “Two heterosexual actors pretending to be gay. So, the complete opposite of some famous Scientologists, then.” It’s not a new joke but perhaps the A-list audience had never had someone say it to their face.

Grossest Visuals: When Gervais advised Hugh Hefner’s 24-year-old fiancé to not “look at it when you touch it,” referring to Hefner’s, ah, plaything. He then mimed what she would have to do in the bedroom. I also didn’t need the bit about Gervais having to help the Hollywood Foreign Press’s president, Philip Berk, get off the toilet and pop in his teeth. I’m all for irreverent but it has to be funny, not just disgusting.

That's Ramirez in the back

Biggest who’s-that-guy?! moment: When Carlos won for best TV miniseries and star Édgar Ramírez went up on stage, I paused with a handful of Raisinets halfway to my mouth and said, “Hellooo there, más Ramírez, por favor.” The actor didn’t speak because producer Daniel Leconte accepted the award but Ramírez sure got me interested in checking out Carlos. Heh.

Most adorable acceptance speech opening: Chris Colfer saying, “I think I just dropped my heart between Natalie Portman and Julianne Moore so if anyone sees it, please give it back to me.” I think fans dropped their hearts right at his feet when he said that.

Colfer's triumphant moment

Most defiant acceptance speech closing: Addressing all the kids who are bullied or told “no” or aren’t allowed to be who they are or have what they want because of it, Colfer says, “Screw that, kids” while brandishing his brand-new shiny Globe.

Seat filler with most screen time: Whoever was sitting in Julia Stiles’s seat. When the actress’s name was called as a nominee for best TV supporting actress in Dexter, the camera showed a much older woman who was obviously not Julia Stiles. I kept thinking director Louis J. Horovitz would figure out the mistake and cut away but no, the shot stayed on this mysterious woman, who seemed to really enjoy her close-up.

Funniest self-assessment: Jane Lynch saying “I am nothing if not falsely humble” upon winning best supporting TV actress. Now that I think about it, she may have just described everyone in the room.

Pretty in pink Portman

Cutest TMI: Natalie Portman referring to fiancé Benjamin Millepied’s performance in Black Swan as a fellow dancer who said he had no desire to sleep with her character: “He’s the best actor. It’s not true. He TOTALLY wants to sleep with me!” This isn’t news since she’s pregnant with his child, but Portman always seems so reserved that the uninhibited moment was unexpected.

Most under-the-radar A-list winner: Mark Wahlberg, for being a producer of Boardwalk Empire, which won best TV drama series. Did you know he produced that? I didn’t, but then again, I don’t watch that show.

Best shout-out to people who truly deserve thanks: When Glee won best comedy TV series, one of the writers, Ian Brennan, said: “Thank you to public school teachers. You don’t get paid like it but you’re doing the most important work in America.” How about passing around a hat among the cast and creative team to start a collection for public schools, then?

Most likely to have skipped rehearsal: Andrew Garfield, who repeatedly stumbled while reading the intro for The Social Network. Maybe he should switch to Twitter since tweets are much shorter.

Firth, with his Harley substitute

Most timely win: Colin Firth’s. Referring to a possible mid-life crisis since he just turned 50, the actor said: “Right now, this [award] is all that stands between me and a Harley-Davidson.” I also liked how he called Speech director Tom Hooper and co-star Geoffrey Rush “my two other sides of a surprisingly robust triangle of man love.” Is it wrong to say I want to be part of any geometric shape that includes Firth giving away man love?

Best joke about an illness: After Michael Douglas got the audience on its feet when he made a surprise appearance to announce best motion picture drama, he quipped: “There’s got to be an easier way to get a standing ovation.” It’s good to see him survive his cancer treatment with his sense of humor intact.

Saddest coincidence: Laura Linney won for best TV comedy actress for The Big C, about a woman who has cancer. But she didn’t attend because her father, playwright Romulus Linney, died Saturday of…cancer.

Worst joke about a dead person: David Fincher calling himself JonBenét Rudin, which was just stupid. I guess he was saying producer Scott Rudin has been parading him around to the different award shows and he felt like a beauty pageant puppet but then Rudin would have to be Patsy Ramsey and she’s dead, too.

Dullest acceptance speech: Diane Warren’s, after she won for best original song. You know what’s more boring than reading a bunch of names from a sheet of paper? When you can’t even read your own handwriting and have to stop to figure out what it says.

What were some of your favorite moments? Were the winners deserving? Did you hear that Ryan Murphy confirmed backstage that Anne Hathaway is coming to Glee?

Photos: NBC/Getty

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My Pop Culture Consumption This Week

I consumed a lot of pop culture this week but unfortunately, there were a lot of empty calories. Here’s a quick rundown of a couple new TV series and a movie opening today.

Episodes—Showtime, Sundays, 9:30 p.m. ET/PT

This new Showtime sitcom is about a husband-and-wife team of English screenwriters (Stephen Mangan and Tamsin Greig) enticed by a producer to come to L.A. to do an American version of their hit British TV series. It’s spot-on in its depiction of the inane things network execs and casting people say during casting sessions, but I’m not sure yet if that’s funny or scary. I felt the writers’ pain as they’re made to jump through humiliating hoops to get their show produced, something they had been told was a sure thing. “It IS written in stone…,” one exec says, and another continues, “…but stone? There are things stronger than stone.”

Things get even more ridiculous when the lead actor in the British version (played by the Tony-winning Richard Griffiths), who had been promised the part in the adaptation, has to audition for producers only to be replaced by Matt LeBlanc, playing himself. Mangan and Greig are a little bland as the writers, but LeBlanc is completely in on the joke about him being inappropriate for the part so I’d give Episodes another chance to see how much of a train wreck the show within a show will become. Nerd verdict: Tune in for Episodes.

Off the Map—ABC, Wednesdays, 10 p.m.

It’s a problem when a show’s scenery is more interesting than its characters and storylines. Map, brought to you by producers of Grey’s Anatomy, takes place in an unnamed South American country (it’s shot in Hawaii and looks very Lost-like), where a bunch of young doctors go to start over after some kind of trauma in their past. The group is headed by Martin Henderson, who’s ruggedly handsome but so far doesn’t get to display much personality. Zach Gilford and Mamie Gummer are even less charismatic, with Gummer doing unconvincing line readings which made me cringe and realize she fell far from the awe-inspiring tree that is her mother, Meryl Streep. No, I didn’t have unfair expectations of her because of her lineage (I’ve seen her act before); she was just bad in the pilot.

The exception is Caroline Dhavernas as Lily, whose smart and steady blue eyes promise a steeliness that should come in handy in a primitive environment that uses coconut milk as blood transfusion because it contains similar qualities to blood plasma (I didn’t take notes). She also shows some spunk in cutting a man down from a zip line after his arm got caught in the wheel (ow!). Gummer’s character calls her a girl scout but Lily is more interesting to watch than the supposed hot shots. Nerd verdict: Map is off.

The Dilemma, opening today

While watching this latest Ron Howard movie, I kept thinking, “This can NOT be by the same man who directed A Beautiful Mind and Frost/Nixon.” The Dilemma is about Ronny (Vince Vaughn), who catches the wife (Winona Ryder) of his best friend (Kevin James) cheating and can’t decide if he should tell him because the two men are working on a big, stressful business project together. Ronny’s indecision is somewhat understandable but what’s not is why he doesn’t confide in anyone. He lies to his too-patient girlfriend (Jennifer Connelly) and starts behaving erratically, even getting into a drawn-out fight with the wife’s lover (Channing Tatum). I think this movie is supposed to be a comedy but none of it is very funny and people get really hurt, physically and emotionally. When Ronny sits on a park bench and starts asking God to give him guidance in the situation, it takes a bizarre turn into serious territory. Vaughn doesn’t have enough charm to save this movie, Connelly’s talents are wasted and Ryder looks terrific but strenously overacts in all her emotional scenes. Nerd verdict: Skipping Dilemma is an easy decision.

I also finished a couple books this week but they’re March releases so I’ll review them closer to their pub dates. I read Aaron Sorkin’s script for The Social Network, which you can download by going here. This weekend, I’m looking forward to the Golden Globes, which I’ll be blogging about and maybe sharing some behind-the-scenes scoop!

What are you looking forward to watching and/or reading this weekend?

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Armchair Casting: Chesley Sullenberger & Wonder Woman

A movie based on the story of Captain Chesley Sullenberger, the pilot who landed a plane on the Hudson River in January 2009, is coming to a screen near you. According to reports like this one, Sullenberger was persuaded to go Hollywood by Harrison Ford, who’s also a pilot. (Han Solo made him do it!) The movie, which might air on TV, will be produced by Frank Marshall and Kathleen Kennedy, longtime producers of Spielberg movies including Raiders of the Lost Ark and Schindler’s List.

Who do you think should play Sullenberger? Two ideas off the top of my head: James Cromwell (Babe, L.A. Confidential) or Michael O’Neill (a million TV shows).

Cromwell

O'Neill

The other interesting project that might be coming into your living room, according to the Hollywood Reporter, is David E. Kelly’s small-screen reboot of Wonder Woman. This news makes me feel 10 years old again. The 1970s version starring Lynda Carter was appointment television for me and I now own all the DVDs. I would prefer to see a cinematic version (I squealed like a kid who got a new pony when I found out Joss Whedon was writing a feature years ago) but I’ll take my favorite Justice League member on TV if it means I’ll get to see her in live action again.

But who can fill Wonder Woman’s red boots? It’s harder to come up with ideas for this one because the actress has to be just right. I’ve already been disappointed by the recent Bionic Woman reboot because Michelle Ryan just didn’t click as Jaime Sommers. How about Ashley Greene from the Twilight movies or Minka Kelly from Friday Night Lights?

Greene

Kelly

How would you cast these roles? Would you watch either of these movies if/when they air?

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Mondo’s Surprise on PROJECT RUNWAY

**SPOILERS**

Last night’s episode of Project Runway was probably the most emotionally resounding episode in the entire series. I was sitting there admiring Mondo’s bold textile design of plus signs on a bright fuchsia background when he revealed what it represented: his HIV-positive status. And then he said he’d been keeping that secret for over 10 years and even his mother, who visited him during the episode, didn’t know.

Wow. Talk about a personal inspiration for a design. What made it so moving for me was the print being so bold and bright (though I would’ve liked it better on a skirt instead of pants). If you didn’t know the story behind it, you might think it’s whimsical. Mondo’s refusal to be somber about his status gutted me.

During the judging, I really, really didn’t want Mondo to tell the judges his story, despite Nina Garcia’s prompting. It didn’t feel right for him to reveal his secret to the world before confiding in family. I also didn’t want him to milk the story for sympathy votes and I admired him when he held firm.

But then he did it—he disclosed the reason for the plus signs. At least he waited until after the judges already fawned over his design. And then he cried and said he felt free—who can begrudge him that? I only hope he went home and told his mother after the taping so that she didn’t have to learn about it from watching TV.

What did you think of Mondo’s revelation? Think he’ll be in the final three?

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PCNotes & Mini-Reviews

I’m sad to hear about Eddie Fisher’s passing last night at the age of 82. I follow Carrie Fisher on Twitter and just last week, she said he was on the mend after surgery for a broken hip. She sounded upbeat about his recovery so his death seems sudden.

Two years ago, I got to spend a day with Carrie. She was very kind to me and sent a nerdy girl over the moon. I’m sorry she lost her father.

*******************

A couple mini-reviews as you head into the weekend:

You Again

You wanna know how much trouble this movie is in? The ad campaigns make sure you know Betty White is in it when she only plays a minor role. This “comedy” starring Kristen Bell as Marni, whose brother (Lone Star‘s Jimmy Wolk) is about to marry her high school nemesis (Odette Yustman), is so bad, it’s painful to watch. People overact maniacally, as if they’re trying to cover up the fact the movie is DOA. Kristin Chenoweth’s wedding coordinator is eccentric for no reason and, worse, to no comedic effect. The best moments are between the veterans, Jamie Lee Curtis and Sigourney Weaver, whose characters had their own rivalry in high school. And White is winning as usual as Marni’s grandma but since she’s everywhere, you don’t have to pay money to see her in the theater.

Nerd verdict: No fun seeing You Again

Undercovers

Can’t put my finger on why this new J.J. Abrams spy caper, directed by Abrams, didn’t blow me away, even when the lead spies played by Gugu Mbatha-Raw and Boris Kodjoe blew up stuff, the former with a rocket launcher while driving. Perhaps it’s because Mbatha-Raw and Kodjoe are nice to look at but somehow too slick to be fully accessible. Abrams’s previous spy muse, Jennifer Garner, switched between warm civilian Sydney and all-business Sydney whenever she was on a mission. So far, Samantha and Steven Bloom are all cool, all the time. Gerald McRaney, as their CIA handler, does inject a shot of welcome gruffness into the proceedings and I like the international locales so will tune in next week to see if the show manages to bloom.

Nerd verdict: Could be warmer Undercovers

What are you planning to see/read/watch this weekend?

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Capsule Reviews: GLEE Premiere, RAISING HOPE, RUNNING WILDE & CHASE

Though my butt is once again numb from too much couch time Tuesday night, I can’t say it was all time well spent. I enjoyed the Glee premiere but so far none of the new shows have wowed me. Here’s a quick rundown to help you spend your time more wisely.

**SPOILERS!**

Glee

Dot-Marie Jones, as the new football coach, Ms. Beiste, instantly made herself a welcome addition to the cast. Ms. Beiste is mean, vulnerable, unpredictable—someone only a skilled actress can pull off. Sue (Jane Lynch) now has a formidable opponent. The jury’s still out on Chord Overstreet as new kid Sam because I just can’t get past that “Bieber haircut,” as Finn calls it. Sam did a nice rendition of “Billionaire” but there’s nothing memorable about his voice.

Charice’s guest star turn as Sunshine was unnecessary since she doesn’t sing better than any of the girls in New Directions. I wish her solo moment could’ve been given to Mercedes (Amber Riley) or Tina (Jenna Ushkowitz), incredible singers who don’t get showcased enough. Sunshine’s choosing to join Vocal Adrenaline was no big loss as far as I’m concerned. I did enjoy seeing Cheyenne Jackson as the new V.A. director and Charice’s line: “They gave my mom a condo and a green card!”

Mike Chang (Harry Shum Jr.) and Tina are adorable together. Who knew Mike had those abs?? Brittany’s (Heather Morris) attempt to accuse Ms. Beiste of molestation was so wrong but her confession of “I actually want to touch her boobs” was even more so. I felt bad for Finn being thrown off the football team. His dating Rachel, who was super bitchy this episode, can’t possibly help his self-esteem. Rachel’s solo rendition of “What I Did for Love” was lovely but I missed the big group number that usually closes the show.

Nerd verdict: A subdued but still-fun Glee

Raising Hope

This new FOX sitcom about a young man still living at home who becomes a dad from a one night stand is from My Name is Earl‘s creator, Greg Garcia. It resembles that other sitcom in several ways: the white trash family, the voiceover narration, an appearance by actor Gregg Binkley, who played Kenny on Earl. (A newscaster even mentioned Earl on TV, though not by name.) One way it differed was that it wasn’t funny. The confused and often topless grandma (Cloris Leachman) who kisses her grandson on the mouth makes me cringe. OK, there was one decent line—a prison guard, talking about a death-row inmate, says: “Her last meal requests are a McRib and a Shamrock Shake. That should buy her a few more months. Those things are never available at the same time.” Hope isn’t a terrible show; there’s just something off either in the comic timing or maybe the ensemble just hasn’t gelled.

Nerd verdict: My Hopes are low for this one

Running Wilde

This is an odd little show. Can’t really recommend it but it’s not without merits, one being that it’s odd. Not all of the eccentricities are funny but at least this isn’t a run-of-the-mill sitcom. Will Arnett plays a spoiled rich man, Steven Wilde, who’s trying to win over his childhood crush, Emmy (Keri Russell), an eco-activist who’s been living in the jungle for years. Arnett and Russell are both engaging actors but I can’t say I’m rooting for their characters to be together because there’s absolutely no romantic heat there. Heck, Arnett has more chemistry with his driver, Migo (Mel Rodriguez), who’s paid to be his friend. Young Stefania Owen, who plays Emmy’s daughter, Puddle, is also a winsome presence but in this instance, the sum is less than its parts.

Nerd verdict: Not Wilde about it

Chase

This is an NBC Monday night drama I only got around to watching last night. I’m not a big fan of Jerry Bruckheimer-produced television but this one’s fast pace kept my interest. The show about U.S. Marshals lives up to its title by providing quite a few chases, mostly on foot. The villain (Travis Fimmel) was a serial-killing bastard so watching the Marshals close him down was rather satisfying. Kelli Giddish, as team leader Annie Frost, has an athletic tomboy quality that makes her believable when she jumps from a helicopter or off a bridge to get the bad guy (the actors apparently do many of their own stunts). She chews some of her lines, though, trying a little too hard to act tough. She looks like she’s got the grit; if she relaxes a bit, she’d be even better.

Of her team, Amaury Nolasco is the one I’m most happy to see. I miss my Sucre from Prison Break. Can’t say the same for Jesse Metcalf, whom I couldn’t stand on Desperate Housewives and is now playing the dumbest Marshal ever. Admittedly, that’s not his fault; he’s given stupid lines. His character wouldn’t be qualified to fetch coffee for office staff, much less be a field deputy.

I was surprised I enjoyed this show on any level because the preview was terrible. Perhaps it made me feel a little safer to see the good guys prevail, something that doesn’t always happen in these uncertain times.

Nerd verdict: Action-packed Chase

What did you think of the Glee premiere? Did you watch anything else?

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TV Pilot Review: LONE STAR

FOX’s new drama, Lone Star (premiering Monday, September 20), is set in the world of Texas oil with a two-timing con man at its center. If you’re thinking, Isn’t that called Dallas and was done in the ’80s? I’d say, Nope. Dallas had a compelling (albeit sleazy) lead character and was entertaining camp.

Lone Star has newcomer James Wolk as a con man leading a double life with two different women in different Texas cities. As Robert in Midland, he has a sweet blonde girlfriend (Eloise Mumford) and scams locals, including her family, by selling them fake investments. As Bob in Houston, he’s married to Cat (Adrianne Palicki) and angling his way into the company owned by his father-in-law, oil tycoon Clint (Jon Voight). Perhaps Robert/Bob can’t be faulted for his actions since he’s been living a life of crime with his scam-artist father (David Keith) since he was a little boy.

After Bob gets a top position at Clint’s company, he decides he wants to go legit. Well, as legit as he can be when he’s juggling two different women, both of whom he claims to be in love with. He also doesn’t know jack about oil drilling and Clint has already made overt statements about how he deals with people who cross him—it’s mentioned several times that Clint’s brother Ray is dead because he tried something foolish with Clint. I assume the rest of the season will deal with how Robert/Bob will manage to keep the scams going and his hide from getting skinned by Clint.

Wolk is perfectly good-looking but there’s something too self-conscious about him to make Robert/Bob work for me. The best actors make it look like they don’t even know the camera’s in the room, that we’re somehow peeking into their private moments. Wolk always seems to be aware of the camera; in close-ups, I can see him acting. I’m not talking about the scenes when he’s pulling a con so he’s supposed to be putting on an act, but those in which he’s being open with his father. Perhaps this is because Wolk hasn’t worked in film for very long—I read in an interview he’s been in L.A. only three years. In You Again, the movie opening next week in which he plays Kristen Bell’s brother, he has this same I’m-not-quite-comfortable-in-front-of-the-camera-yet quality.

He also doesn’t make a convincing con man because he gives giant tells when he’s cornered. In a scene when he thinks Clint is onto him, Bob looks like he might pee his pants. He needs to be less obvious or Clint will squash him like a bug. Maybe Wolk will loosen up eventually and then Bob will be more of a match for his father-in-law.

Besides the intimidating Voight, only Mumford makes much of an impression. She has an open, trusting quality that makes it believable her Lindsay wouldn’t suspect anything. If Robert/Bob had to pick one woman and asked my advice, I’d tell him to choose Lindsay. Cat comes with a lot of baggage from her family, including her two bland brothers played by Mark Deklin and Bryce Johnson.

Marc Webb, who helmed the charming (500) Days of Summer and is rebooting the Spider-Man franchise, couldn’t add any sparks to this, though his work is competent enough. For a show that takes place under the hot Texas sun, Lone Star is oddly tepid.

Nerd verdict: Lackluster Star

Disclosure: I was given a screener because I’m a Klout influencer. I was under no obligation to receive it or talk about it. I get no monetary compensation for talking about it or mentioning the company.

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Quick GLEE Notes

Glee returns next week but in the meantime, a couple of fun tidbits have emerged. You may have heard, as this article on E!’s website says, Tina’s hooking up with “Other Asian” Mike Chang this season. I think Artie had his chance with her so I’m glad she’s moving on. Hopefully, this means Harry Shum Jr. will get more lines.

Here’s also a look at John Stamos as Dr. Carl, Emma’s new boyfriend. He’ll make his first appearance in the second episode, “Britney/Brittany,” airing September 28.

Music-wise, you can hear the cast singing Jay-Z and Alicia Keys’s “Empire State of Mind” below. What do you think? Looking forward to Glee‘s return?

Photos: Adam Rose/FOX

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TV Review: NIKITA

For months now, giant billboards of Maggie Q in slinky outfits have been decorating the streets of L.A., trumpeting the arrival of a not-quite-new badass. When the latest reboot of La Femme Nikita finally premiered Thursday night, it had about as much depth as its advertising campaign.

Maggie Q stars as the titular character, now a lone wolf seeking revenge on the Division, the shady government agency that plucked her out of jail and trained her to be an assassin. Meanwhile, Lyndsy Fonseca is Nikita Jr., a drug addict named Alex who gets caught during a robbery, charged with a murder she didn’t commit and recruited by the Division. The premiere episode cuts back and forth between Nikita trying to find the organization’s weak spots and Alex adjusting to her new situation as a trainee, with some asskicking and Q in sleek outfits thrown in.

The problem was I didn’t find any of the lead actors convincing. Fonseca has a soft, apple-pie healthiness that doesn’t translate into a Ukrainian meth head. She’d snarl and try to give ‘tude but comes across as posing. Shane West, as the Division recruiter/handler Michael, overacts with his cheesy chewing of every line, none of which held any conviction. He wants to be intimidating but I ain’t buying it.

Q is harder to pin down. She has an iciness befitting a killer but it also makes her inaccessible. In the original Luc Besson movie, Anne Parillaud was allowed to be vulnerable and fierce, sometimes wiping away tears while blowing away bad guys. Q’s Nikita is all glacier. She looks good in Nikita’s costume changes but that only accentuates how mannequin-like she is. And her slight frame, devoid of any muscle tone, is too fragile to be badass or sexy. When a bad guy hits her during a fight, I worried she’d snap right in half. That’s something I was never concerned about while watching Jennifer Garner on Alias.

I have a weak spot for fightin’ ladies, though, so until my favorite shows return and there are other new series to check out, I’ll probably give Nikita another go. But the show had better start making me care about its characters or it’ll be permanently eliminated from my DVR.

Did you watch? How do you think this Nikita compares to the previous incarnations?

Nerd verdict: Nikita misses the mark

Photo Credit: Jordin Althaus/The CW

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STAND UP TO CANCER Tonight

I don’t think any of us can say we’ve never known anyone who’s been affected by cancer in some way. I’ve lost family members and friends to the disease, one friend a year ago this month, and would like to see a cure in my lifetime. I believe it’s possible and that’s why I’m spotlighting Stand Up to Cancer, the celebrity-packed one-hour event airing tonight to raise money for cancer research. It will be broadcast commercial-free starting at 8 p.m. ET/PT, 7 p.m. CT on ABC, NBC, CBS, FOX, HBO, VH1, E!, among other channels (click here to see all the participants).

In case you haven’t heard, A-list Hollywood talent will be there, including George Clooney, Gwyneth Paltrow, Renée Zellweger, Will Smith, Denzel Washington, Rob Lowe, and a long list of others, some of whom are survivors like Christina Applegate and Lance Armstrong.

Half an hour before the show starts, the celebrity phone lines will open and a pre-show hosted by So You Think You Can Dance’s Cat Deely will be streamed online at the networks’ websites (cbs.com, nbc.com, etc.) plus Hulu, YouTube, AOL, MSN, YouTube and several other portals. These sites will also stream the one-hour special.

My friend Lauren Clemmons is among the amazing team of people working behind the scenes almost 24/7 to pull off this event. She tells me Glee‘s Mike O’Malley will be doing man-on-the-street interviews in the pre-show, asking people what they’d give up to end cancer. She says there’s also a funny segment in the main show involving Seth Rogen, Ken Jeong and Elizabeth Banks that’s not to be missed.

But celebrities aside, Lauren says, “If people can watch the show and learn about the science that we’ve funded, I think it will really make a difference on how the public sees how research is being done at SU2C. It really is so cool to see so many medical and science fields come together to help make strides in finding successful treatments for this disease.”

For more info about SU2C and to donate, click here.

So, will you stand up? Who will you be remembering as you watch tonight?

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Best & Worst of Emmys 2010

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Despite knowing that award shows have a tendency to be long and tedious, I was looking forward to this year’s Emmys because I liked many of the nominees. But after a rousing opening number with Jimmy Fallon leading the Glee kids, Jon Hamm, Tina Fey and others in singing and dancing to Bruce Springsteen’s Born to Run (see it here), the energy level dipped considerably.

I was happy about some of the results—Jane Lynch’s win for Glee, Modern Family for best comedy series, Archie Panjabi’s upset victory for best supporting actress in a drama series for The Good Wife—and unhappy about others: Hugh Laurie’s loss for the fifth time. Did voters not see last season’s premiere when he was in the psychiatric hospital, and the finale when he advised the woman to have her leg amputated so she wouldn’t have chronic pain like he does?

For a complete list of winners, click here. Keep reading for my thoughts on the highlights and lowlights of the evening.

Best sport: George Clooney participating in a skit about a clueless network executive trying to improve on Modern Family for next season. Julie Bowen and Sofia Vergara both liked the idea of their characters falling in love with Clooney after their TV husbands are killed off. Then Eric Stonestreet and Jesse Tyler Ferguson revealed they wouldn’t mind having Clooney in a threesome with Mitch and Cam, to which Clooney said, “I’ve got to get a film.”

Classiest act: Clooney again. When he won the Bob Hope Humanitarian Award, he gave an eloquent speech that I couldn’t have agreed with more. An excerpt:

We live in such strange times where bad behavior sucks up all the attention in the press and the people who really need the spotlight—the Haitians, the Sudanese, people in the Gulf Coast on the five-year anniversary [of Katrina], people in Pakistan—they can’t get any…

Now the truth is, look, when a disaster happens, everybody wants to help…The hard part is, seven months later, five years later when we’re on to a new story…we fail at that, most of the time. I fail at that.

So here’s hoping that some very bright person, right here in the room or at home watching, can help find a way to keep the spotlight burning on these heartbreaking situations that continue to be heartbreaking long after the cameras go away.

Clooney for president! Then maybe he can ban talentless idiots from getting press for having sex tapes.

Biggest regret: Seeing Kim Kardashian and Kate Gosselin on my TV. I’ve made it a mission in life to not watch/see/read anything that involves these two (see previous rant about people who shouldn’t be famous) and have avoided exposure up until tonight. But they popped up on the red carpet and did intros with Fallon. My brain felt so infected, I wanted an injection of antibiotics.

Best booty shakin’: Jon Hamm. His goofy dancing with Betty White as his coach made me like him more when I thought that wasn’t possible. Tina Fey told Entertainment Weekly‘s Michael Ausiello that Hamm will be back for 30 Rock‘s live episode this fall and I can’t wait to see what his character Drew will do with his hooks for hands.

Funniest reason for rooting for a nominee: Ricky Gervais wanting Bucky Gunts to win for directing the Vancouver 2010 Olympic Winter Games opening ceremony simply because “I didn’t know you could say [Bucky Gunts] on television.” Then Gunts actually won! Hilarious.

Winner most in danger of losing job: Erin Levy, co-winner of best drama series writing with Matthew Weiner for Mad Men. Levy said she’d previously been Weiner’s assistant before getting the opportunity to write for the show. Last year’s co-winner with Weiner, Kater Gordon, said the same thing then lost her job two months later.

Most inept fact checker: The person responsible for spelling Julia Ormond’s name Julia OrmAnd when she won the best miniseries supporting actress award for Temple Grandin. It’s Ormond’s first Emmy; it would’ve been nice for her to see her name spelled correctly on screen if she wants to watch that moment later.

Now on to best and worst of the fashion…

You’d think the celebs were attending a funeral based on the predominance of black and midnight blue dresses. Eva Longoria Parker, Julie Bowen, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Edie Falco, Lea Michele and Heidi Klum were just a few wearing this dark hue on a sunny August day, making me sweat just looking at them.

Among this sea of somberness, it was easy for me to pick my favorite dress:

Photo: Jay L. Clendenin/L.A. Times

Keri Russell looks pretty, summery, cool and comfortable. Her dress is vintage Jean Louis Scherrer; extra credit to Russell for having bought it herself from an L.A. vintage shop.

Check out the slide show below for my thoughts on other fashion choices…

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What did you think of the show? How did you like Fallon as host? Most memorable moments for you?